Deja vu

Have you ever felt like you have seen someone before or that you know someone from somewhere but can't put two and two together? Well ever since Ellie was born, I would look at her and get this strange feeling. She has always looked so familiar and I get this feeling like I know her from somewhere.  Not like I know her because she hangs out with me everyday and depends on me for all that she needs, but deeper than that.  This strange familiarity has always been a special tie I've felt with my baby.  She is a little piece of heaven in my arms and honestly my best friend. She knows exactly how to make me feel better on a rough day and how to remind me what is truly important in this life.  I feel like motherhood has come so natural to me.  It feels as if I am only now becoming the person that I was destined to be.  As I think back on my life, I see myself with all of these dreams and goals and no plan of backing down.  Its funny how your dreams and goals change when a little person finds their way into your life.  Now my life consists of the sweetest dreams and some of the hardest goals I've ever set.  How grateful I am for the opportunity to raise this daughter of mine.  How grateful I am for the trust that God has put into me to allow me to teach and love this sweet daughter of His.  How grateful I am for the little glimpses of heaven I feel when I look into those crystal blue eyes.  Maybe I do know her from somewhere.  Maybe I have always known her.  Maybe I am reminded by those deja vu feelings of a place we all were at one point, a place I don't remember physically but can feel in my heart and know without a shadow of a doubt exists.

A Letter to An Angel

Dear Lauren Brenn,
      Happy Birthday baby sister.  It has been 22 years since you were born and there isn't a day that goes by that our family dosen't think about you and miss your sweet face.  I know I am a few days late but sometimes that day is still hard for all of us. I hope you know we love you and know you are staying busy up in heaven taking care of all of us.
     Ellie misses you too. I like to think that you took care of my little miracle before she was sent to me. That you held her hand and kissed her sweet face and told her all about her mommy and how much she would be loved. She is so beautiful and has the sweetest spirit. Sometimes I think she looks like you.  Her smile makes the world right and she completes both me and Leon.
     I met a lady on a plane a few weeks ago who i noticed was sobbing in the seat next to me. The stewardess asked if she needed anything and she told the stewardess that she was rushing to see her dying sister at St. Joseph's in Phoenix.  My heart was pounding outside my chest because I knew what it was like to lose a baby sister, and I felt like I needed to talk to her. I still have trouble talking about it sometimes. So, I said a little prayer and I got the courage up to talk to her. I told her that I overheard the conversation and was so sorry and I could imagine the pain she must be in because I've felt the pain of loss too. I tried to get her mind off of the situation so that the flight wouldn't be so miserable. We talked about ducks, business, love, and of course Ellie. I bore my testimony to her that I knew she would see her sister again and that Heavenly Father loves her family and will bring her the peace and comfort that she needs at that time if she turns to Him.  He can do all things if only we ask. I know this with all my heart.  I even offered to take her to St Joe's from the airport haha but she didn't need a ride.  Before she left she told me I was an angel and she couldn't have gotten through the ride without me.  I am nowhere near an angel, but I was so grateful that missing you could allow me to help someone else.
For your birthday my little family went to In and Out and got cheeseburgers. I know they were your favorite. Even Ellie got to join in. She sure does like pickles. We even took some pictures to commemorate the event. We sure do love you and miss you. Take care of my other babies. Tell them I can't wait to see their beautiful faces. We can't wait to see yours too. I love you. Happy Birthday.
Love,
 Brittany

Happy Birthday Lala

Burger House

Have i ever told you about Burger house?  Well if I haven't, shame on me. This little hole in the wall Mexican restaurant is found in a little town on your way from mesa to Thatcher called Miami. Their Green Chili Burritos are to DIE for. In fact they probably got the recipe from angles directly.  Whenever leon wants to go to Thatcher for the weekend all he has to do is bribe me with the idea of Burger House and I am in the car before you can say go. My mother in law even brought me a bag of green chili burros to the hospital when Ellie was born (yes she is a saint). If you ever find yourself in the middle of the Arizona desert, hungry and in need of some heavenly Mexican look for this:

The princess even woke up from her nap to enjoy the goodness of burgerhouse

Ellie's little hand can't wait to eat that tortilla..she loves mexican food already

Hungry Yet?



Absolutely, Positively

in love with this creature. I love her big two bottom teeth when she smiles. It reminds me of a beaver haha. I can't get enough of her. I think Leon and I might love this baby too much. She never has lips off her cheeks or praises out of her ears. Can you love a baby too much? I sure hope not lol. I can't imagine a more intoxicating human being: her laugh, her serious face, her teeth, her toes, her smell, her kisses...I could go on and on but I have to take an er final in about eight min so I'll stop there.

Ellie Callait, 

I love you more and more everyday!! 

Thanks for making me feel this way!!

Three letters that spell confidence to investors world wide

The CFA Program includes a series of three exams that are offered in test centers around the world. These three exams — Level I, Level II, and Level III — must be passed sequentially as one of the requirements for earning a CFA charter.

Leon Passed!!!

There are three levels to this big financial analyst exam and Leo passed his first one! He studied so hard and I am so proud of him! I sure did marry me a smarty pants :) Not to mention a good looking athletic stud who can make some mean mashed potatoes and change a diaper in the dark haha. Not to brag or anything. He is perfect for me and I love him and am so proud to get to spend forever with this one of a kind superstud. Congrats BZ you are awesome! 

Last Day of Class

Mr and Mrs. Johnson + little Johnson = more happiness than you could ever know

E and T love each other and are always so excited to get to play

The three cousins making lots of good trouble

The girls love their grandma

Ellie loves grandma Ina's "pretties"

How do I get this baby to sit still for two sec...oh yeah I can't

What a weird feeling.  As I sat in class today and looked around at what has been my world for the past 18 years, I couldn't believe that today was my last day of class...ever.  All those sat-in-the-chair-too-long back aches and smart ace remarks from the kid sitting behind you are through.  Its time to be a big girl and do big girl things (like save lives maybe..or just bring little lives into this world deliver them I mean not have more...YET ;) ).  I just finished my first year of my graduate program, and don't get me wrong I am not done with school, but I am done with classroom study.  Yay! I can't wait to get out into the real world and practice what I have been studying for the past 5 years. I am deathly afraid, but I'm also so excited. My first rotation is OBGYN, which is perfect for me considering I was the prenatal patient not too long ago.  

We went out with the family tonight to celebrate and to get some quality bonding time in before we head off for our east coast adventure in a few weeks.  We got to see everyone except Elliot and Luke and their families.  We are truly going to miss the beautiful weather here and especially the delicious mexican food. We went to eat at Tia Rosa's (Audrey it was to die for and we must go again before I leave.) and I loved it. So fun to be with family catching up and having a good time.

And now here I am stuck at my computer, knowing it is going to be a long night of geriatrics (yay my favorite..sense the sarcasm?) and pralines and cream haha.  Oh how it will feel to be done with finals?  Wish me luck next week and hope I pass all my classes. Anyway,  I just thought I might spice it up the night with a few of some quality shots of the beautiful family.  We love and miss you all!

PS: THE LITTLE PRINCESS STOOD UP IN THE MIDDLE OF THE ROOM ALL BY HERSELF OUT OF NOWHERE TONIGHT FOR THE FIRST TIME!! YAY FOR E!!

Love the Johnsons

Mini Me

Leon took this gem one morning while Ellie and I were sleeping.  It's perfect because it illustrates one of my favorite phenomenon's of parenthood. I like to call it the "mini me" phenomenon.  Oh and how Ellie exhibits this perfectly. Not only does the princess look just like her mama with her blonde hair and round face, but she acts just like me too.  She is so feisty it is funny.  If someone touches her that she doesn't know or feel comfortable with she will give them a "what do you think you are doing" look and swiftly pull her arm away. She is so stubborn. Lets just say try feeding her when she doesn't feel like eating. And then be sure to wipe the peas off your face that she just blew at you.  She is the most cuddly, loving little girl I know.  She will just jump on your lap and start giving you kisses and blow bubbles on your face.  This I love because we can just smother each other all day. She loves to cuddle at night, sometimes we have to fight over Leon. Good thing he has two arms.  She talks and talks and talks and talks. I don't know how Leon is ever going to get a word in.  She is all that is girl. She loves sparkly things and watching Mommy put on make up in the morning.  I love this little girl and am so glad that she changed my whole world.

One year down...

One year to go!!

I love them

The Johnson Family

Me and my perfect little Ellie Bean

Katie and I were both prego with these bambinos this time last year and now they are so big!

Tonight was my "Pinning Ceremony" for PA school! For those of you not well aquatinted with my PA school jargon its kinda like graduation of your didactic year and the entrance to clinical patient care.  This year has been the most challenging year of my life both academically and personally. I am so proud of myself for getting through it with my head high.  My wonderful family cannot be given enough credit for all of their love and support.  My wonderful mom has literally driven to Arizona a million times to watch Ellie and help me out with "life", my beautiful baby has sat with me and gone through note cards and slides trying to memorize anything and everything medicine, my selfless little sister and dad have allowed my mom to leave so that I could get through this year and still be a mommy to Ellie Belly, and last but not even close to least my sweet husband who has given up a year of his life to be Mr. Mom and my biggest inspiration and motivation to keep on going (I'm pretty sure that was one really long run on sentence lol).  

I walked across the stage. Got my pin. They finally changed my last name. Leon and Ellie sat and cheered me on and made me feel so special. We missed you Mimi and Jaxon. I still can't wear eye make up so these pictures are a little haggard but hope you feel like you were there :) muah!!

Clean up, clean up, everybody everywhere

clean up, clean up, everybody do your share.

Can you believe we are moving in less than a month now? Ah, its crazy and oh how I love our little apartment. I'm going to miss Arizona more than anything.  The people we have met here are wonderful, the weather is to die for, and the mexican food is heaven.  Arizona has so much history for our little family and we will cherish our time here, but we are excited to start a new chapter in our lives out in the northeast.  I can't wait to see Boston and to experience all the culture and history.  I am so excited for Leon to start Law school and to see him become a Harvard gentleman. haha.

 We have been trying to do some deep cleaning to take a little load off of our backs come time for the big cross country move and everyone is pitching in haha. Ellie thinks she is so big.  Every time the fridge door opens she jams her little body over there and climbs on in.  She loves to play with the capri suns stashed in the bottom ledge.  It was her job to help Daddy pull out all the food so the fridge could get nice and clean.  She did her job superbly. I love that little monkey more than anything!

I can see!!

Ok well kind of.  I went and got lasik surgery on my eyes today.  My eyes are watering like niagra and burning like the sun outside my house.  I was so surprised by the whole thing.  I thought it would be no big deal. A little laser here a little laser there, so when they handed me a teddy bear when I sat down I just laughed inside.  Then not two min later I was gripping the Teddy for dear life.  It felt so weird to get your eyeballs sucked out and to smell the burning flesh. egh. So when i left the room I was shocked by my experience.  Not bad, just not what I expected.  Now my eyes hurt and I feel nauseated. I can't wear eye make up for a week and my pinning ceremony is on Monday. And to top it off I'm not allowed to sleep until six, so I have to lay here with my eyes shut and fight the urge to sleep. Well I'm hoping it will all be worth it tomorrow when I can see the teacher's face from the back of the classroom. Yay for eyes that work.

Ellie thought Mommy's hat was really funny

Daddy is taking such good care of both of us. Yay for wonderful husbands

A day at the park

I know I have been posting a lot lately, but Ellie just gets cuter and cuter everyday.  I wanted to show you all how much the little love bug loves the park.  For the fourth of July we went to Holli and Jake's house and got the chance to just go play at the park together. Ellie loves the swings and playing on the slide.  Leon is seriously every little kids dream.  He works hard and plays hard lol.  He has been everything from the gila monster in the pool to the gummy bear machine in the bed to the ultimate fort maker in the living room.  Oh how I love cleaning up the messes he makes with the kids lol. Ellie is so lucky to have a daddy that loves to have so much fun.  I know I have said it a million times but they are seriously best friends and the cutest little duo in the world.  I always dreamed of marrying someone who would be a good dad but Leon honestly redefines the meaning of "a good dad".  Leon is the best dad in the world and has never loved anything as much as he loves little Ellie.  He would go to the moon and back to make her smile.  We are both so lucky to have him in our lives.  

Sweet Ellie Bean and my Dreamboat Husband so excited to play

Ellie's first time down the big slide

She is so big and so high

Ah tell me that smile is not to die for I honestly melt every time she throws that my way

I might have been having a rough hair day but Ellie Belly is my perfect accessory and she makes everyday and everything beautiful (ps she is laughing not crying)

Ellie's favorite part of the park

I miss you Jaxy! Come to Arizona and play with me at the park. I will say hi and wave to you, then I will show you my favorite dog, then I will show you splashy the whale and swim with you, after that we can play with my pink ball which I am very good at throwing, and then I can show you how I can stand up all by my self. I miss you so much and can't wait to see my best friend that is a little boy!!

love Ellie

Chocoholic

This is what happens when you leave the lid to your Ben and Jerry's ice cream on the coffee table.  The Scavenger will find anything and everything chocolate in our house.  I caught her red handed licking the lid like she was in baby heaven.  Isn't she just delectable?

Love, Love, You

So, I just thought I would share some more pics of the little love bug and her cousins from our trip.  She loves Carder and Baby B so much and they both love Ellie Belly too.  I always love the time I get to spend with Holli and her little family, but I mostly always love the time I get to spend with ellie.  She is honestly the sweetest little baby and I wouldn't want to imagine a world without her.  There is nothing I would change about the peanut, from her dopey ears to her crystal blue eyes and delectable rosebud lips. She is honestly my everything and I am so grateful to my Heavenly Father for trusting her sweet little spirit to me.

Poor baby got sick on Monday night and it is honestly killing me because she is still throwing up and having horrible runny diapers.  I have honestly done all that I can do to ensure that baby girl doesn't get dehydrated. Lots of pedialyte and cuddling.  Ellie has been so clingy and won't let me go anywhere without her.  She wants me all day and wants her Dad all night. Poor Carder, Jake, and Holli are all suffering from the bug too. 

The little love of my life

Ellie and Baby Brenn

This is the best thing in the entire world...An Ellie kiss mmmmhmmmm

Ellie loves babies and giving kisses

Wish me luck I'm off to New Mexico tomorrow. Mr. Johnson is the best dad in the world so supportive and loving during my last semester of school. I love him. I love her. I love life.

And then came the fireworks

Ellie and Mommy's fourth of July outfits. How cute is the little fourth of July number that belly is wearing?

This was Ellie's first fireworks show. We literally drove to the light rail station from Vegas and raced to make the fireworks show at Tempe town lake, full bladders and all. This is the third year in a row Leon and I watched the show at Tempe town lake it is such a fun family tradition.

Note her anaconda grip on my neck.  She didn't know what to think at first.

I'll just leave you all with this gem of my two favorite people.

Happy Fourth Of July!!

Happy 4th of July

Ok so the fourth of July might be my favorite holiday of the year.  I just love the summer sun, the bbqs, swimming, and especially fireworks.  There is nothing like a good fourth of july fireworks show haha. Its so funny because Leo and I have spent every fourth of July together (minus my London adventure in 2008) since 2007. This year we decided to spice it up a little and since we are heading to the east coast pretty soon we were dying to see baby B and the Lloyd family.  So we packed up the car and headed off to Las Vegas. 

Ready to ride in my big girl seat

We got a little hungry so we decided to head to Steak and Shake Poppy's favorite restaurant growing up in the midwest. We ate delicious burgers and lots of yummy ice cream (which Daddy feeds Ellie and she goes crazy for).

Hi Grandma and Grandpa Watkins...your favorite grandkids love Steak n Shake too :)

 Then we got to come home and watch Wubsy on Jake and Holli's family bed.  I call it that because it is huge and the perfect place for giggle fests. Carder was doing tricks for Ellie and she was laughing so hard.  She thought he was the funniest boy in the world. 

Ellie and Carder on the big comfy bed

 Then on the fourth of July we had a little cousin photo shoot. Um...it went a little something like this:

"Dog, dog" Ellie kept calling Brenn Dog...we have a little work to do

oh I love that baby

"let me grab that baby"

Ah get me out of here!

Ok now really.. he is like biting my ear.. whose cousin is this anyway?

Thanks for the fun trip we love you to the moon and back.

Love,

The Johnsons