It's True...

Leon and I are going to be parents again.

I love this picture of Leo and Ellie. I think it portrays a myriad of emotions felt as a first time parent. The pure love between parent and child, the dependence on each other, and the peace and comfort felt in each others arms.  Every time I look at it I'm reminded of that beautiful time in my life when I first felt the sparkle of motherhood. It changed me. She changed me, in every way a person can be changed. The love I felt and still feel for this little princess of mine is unmatched in all the world. She is perfect for me and there is never a day that I do not thank my Heavenly Father for the opportunity I have to be her mother.

The thought of another child is absolutely exhilarating. I remember when we brought Ellie home, thinking that I needed a million more. The only problem with this whole second child thing is that I'm not making another Ellie. I keep thinking to myself, "what will this baby be like?", "will this baby be as cuddly and cute as ellie bean?", "is ellie going to feel jealous of all the attention the baby will need?", and of course the dreaded "how in the world could I ever love another human as much as I love Elle?". I know, its awful and my sister in law told me not to be silly because its not like you run out of love. Duh, right? But I just can not wrap my mind around the fact that another child will be joining our family and I am going to love him/her just as much as I love ellie.  Don't get me wrong. I have always been a lover and you definitely don't have to twist my arm to be enveloped in my heart. But with Ellie, I had never experienced motherhood before, so I never knew what was in store for me. And then I realized that Heavenly Father sent me the best of the best. I mean, to have that happen to me twice? I just don't know if I'm that lucky.

It is safe to say we are beyond excited. Ellie is obsessed with babies, so I know she will just die of happiness to have a real one in our house. I told her that I have a baby in my belly, so naturally she thinks she has a baby in her belly too (because we are best friends and everything I do she does too right?). She will lift up her shirt and touch her belly and say "shh baby". It is the cutest. Of course Leon is rooting for a boy, but I think that every girl needs a sister and am hoping it will be a girl. And let us be honest here, Leon CANNOT get enough of his girl and I would love Leo to have his athlete. So, we will be happy either way. I think the hardest part is choosing a name. With Ellie, I knew basically the moment I saw the plus sign on that little plastic applicator that it was Ellie in my belly, haha. And from that moment forward always referred to her as so.  But with this baby, I have no idea. I especially have no idea what to name the little rascal. 

This pregnancy has been much different than Ellie's. I get zero heartburn (knock on wood), I haven't had too much pain in the round ligament arena (I'm thinking I stretched those babies out nice and good last time and they shouldn't be too much of a problem this time around), but the nausea/vomiting is epic. I have been vomiting for three straight months. And nothing helps. It is awful and the worst part is that I get sickest when i don't eat, so naturally I have to keep my stomach full at all times. I might as well pick out my cow bell now right. ugh not fun. But, whatever, as long as the baby is healthy, I will embrace the curves that come along with the process. I am definitely not one of those women who loves being pregnant. I appreciate the process and that end result is priceless, but the whole gain 90lbs, cry over every bump in the road, wake up to an excruciatingly painful chest, go to the bathroom more times than can be counted on your fingers and toes in a day, never sleep through the night, sleep all day is kind of exhausting and it makes you appreciate your non pregnant self.

Baby is due in October and we are ecstatic. Hopefully now that I am well into my second trimester I will start feeling better and we will agree on a name soon. Let us know if you have any suggestions. We love and miss you all and hope to see you this summer!

Muah

Love,

Us